The Offspring of Aeolus - On the Incest Taboo

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 by: Sam Vaknin, Ph.D.

Incest is not such a clear-cut matter as it has been made
out to be over millennia of taboos. Many participants claim to have
enjoyed the act and its physical and emotional consequences. It is
often the result of seduction. In some cases, two consenting and fully
informed adults are involved. Many types of relationships, which are
defined as incestuous, are between genetically unrelated parties (a
stepfather and a daughter), or between fictive kin or between
classificatory kin (that belong to the same matriline or patriline). In
certain societies (the American Indians or the Chinese) it is
sufficient to carry the same family name (=to belong to the same clan)
and marriage is forbidden. Some incest prohibitions relate to sexual
acts - other to marriage. In some societies, incest is mandatory or
prohibited, according to the social class (Bali). In others, the Royal
House started a tradition of incestuous marriages, which were imitated
by lower classes (Ancient Egypt). The list is long and it serves to
demonstrate the diversity of this most universal taboo. Generally put,
we can say that a prohibition to have sex with or marry a related
person should be classified as an incest prohibition, no matter the
nature of the relationship.

Perhaps the strongest feature of incest has been
hitherto downplayed: that it is, essentially, an autoerotic act. Having
sex with a first-degree blood relative is like having sex with
yourself. It is a Narcissistic act and like all acts Narcissistic, it
involves the objectification of the partner. The incestuous Narcissist
over-values and then devalues his sexual partner. He is devoid of
empathy (cannot see the other's point of view or put himself in her
shoes). For an in depth treatment of Narcissism and its psychosexual
dimension, see: "Malignant Self Love - Narcissism Revisited" and
"Frequently Asked Questions" (scroll down for a complete list of FAQs).

But incest involves more than a manifestation of a
personality disorder or of a paraphilia (incest is considered by many
to be a class of pedophilia). It harks back to the very nature of the
family. It is closely entangled with its functions and with its
contribution to the development of the individual within it.

A family is a mechanism of allocation of genetic and
materialistic wealth. Worldly goods are passed on from one generation
to the next through succession, inheritance and residence. Genetic
material is handed down through the sexual act. It is the mandate of
the family to increase both, either by accumulating property or by
exogamy (marrying outside the family). Clearly, incest prevents both.
It preserves a limited genetic pool and makes an increase of material
possessions through intermarriage all but impossible.

Once allocated, the family is an efficient venue of
transferring material wealth, as well as transmitting information and
messages horizontally (among family members) and vertically (down the
generations). A large part of the process of socialization still rides
on the back of this property of the family. It is still by far the most
heavyweight agent of socialization. Gender roles, for instance, are
learned, emulated and assimilated mainly through the family. Incest, in
itself, isolated from its social context and judgement, should not have
affected this function in particular. There is no logical reason why
incest should interfere with socialization, role learning or with the
allocation of material resources (except, perhaps, when it comes to
inheritance). Paradoxically, it is the reaction of society that
transforms incest into such a disruptive phenomenon. The condemnation,
the horror, the revulsion and the social sanctions distort the internal
processes of the incestuous family. It is from society that the child
learns that something is horribly wrong and that he should not adopt
the offending parent as a role model. The formation of the Superego is
stunted and it remains infantile, ideal, sadistic, perfectionist,
demanding and punishing. The Ego, on the other hand, is likely to be
replaced by a False Ego version, whose job it is to suffer the
consequences of the socially hideous act. To sum up: social control in
the case of incest is most likely to produce a Narcissist. Disempathic,
exploitative and in eternal search for Narcissistic supply – the child
becomes a replica of his offending parent.

One of the main businesses of the family is to teach to
its members self control, self regulation and healthy adaptation.
Family members share space and resources, for instance. Siblings share
the mother's emotions and attention. Similarly, the family educates its
young members to master their drives and to postpone the gratification
and satisfaction, which attaches to acting upon them. The incest taboo
teaches children how to control their erotic drive by abstaining from
ingratiating themselves with members of the opposite sex within the
same family. There could be little question that incest constitutes a
lack of control and impedes the proper separation of impulse (or
stimulus) from the response to it. Additionally, it probably interferes
with the defensive aspects of the family's existence. It is through the
family that aggression is legitimately channelled, expressed and
externalized. By imposing discipline and hierarchy on its members, the
family is transformed into a cohesive and efficient war machine. It
sucks in economic resources, social status and members of other
families. It forms alliances and fights other alliances over scarce
goods, tangible and intangible. This efficacy is adversely affected by
incest. It is virtually impossible to maintain discipline and hierarchy
in an incestuous family wherein some members assume sexual roles not
normally theirs. Sex is an expression of power – emotional and
physical. The members of the family involved in the incest surrender
power and assume it out of the regular flow patterns that have made the
family the formidable apparatus that it is. This weakens the family,
both internally and externally. Internally, emotive reactions (such as
jealousy of other family members) and clashing authorities and
responsibilities are likely to undo the delicate unit. Externally, the
family will be vulnerable to ostracism and more official forms of
intervention and dismantling.

Finally, the family is an identity endowment mechanism.
It bestows identity upon its members. Internally, the members of the
family derive meaning from their position in the family tree (coupled
with societal expectations and maxims). Externally, through exogamy,
the family absorbs other identities and develops its own. Exogamy, as
often noted, allows for the creation of extended alliances. It reduces
the solidarity of the nuclear, original family by extending it to
"strangers". The "identity creep" of the family is in total opposition
to incest. The latter even increases the solidarity and cohesiveness of
the incestuous family – but at the expense of its ability to digest and
absorb other identities of other family units.

Freud said that incest provokes horror because it
touches upon our forbidden, ambivalent emotions towards members of our
close family. This ambivalence covers both aggression towards other
members (forbidden and punishable) and (sexual) attraction to them
(doubly forbidden and punishable). Others had an opposite view
(Westermark) that "familiarity breeds contempt" and that the incest
taboo simply reflects emotional reality rather than fight against
inbred instincts.

There is little doubt that incest has nothing to do
with genetic considerations. In today's world incest does not need to
result in pregnancy and the transmission of genetic material. Good
contraceptives should, therefore, encourage bad, incestuous, couples.
In many other life forms, inbreeding or straightforward incest is the
norm (chimpanzees, to mention close relatives). Finally, incest
prohibitions apply to non-genetically-related people in most countries.

The more primitive the society, the more strict and
elaborate the set of incest prohibitions and the fiercer the reactions
of society to its violation. It appears that the less violent the
dispute settlement methods in a given culture – the more lenient the
attitude to incest. Incest seems to interfere with well-established and
rigid patterns of inheritance. This interference led, in all
probability, to disputes. In more primitive societies, arms were
resorted to in an effort to resolve conflicts. To prevent recurrent and
costly bloodshed was one of the intentions of the incest taboo.

The incest taboo is, therefore, a cultural trait.
Protective of the efficient mechanism of the family, society sought to
minimize disruption to its activities and to the clear flows of
authority, responsibilities, material wealth and information
horizontally and vertically. Incest threatened to unravel this
magnificent creation. Alarmed by the possible consequences (internal
and external feuds, a rise in the level of aggression and violence) –
society introduced the taboo. It came replete with physical and
emotional sanctions: stigmatization, revulsion and horror,
imprisonment, the demolition of the errant and socially mutant family
cell. As long as societies revolve around the relegation of power, its
sharing, its acquisition and dispensation – there will always exist an
incest taboo. But in a different society and culture, it is conceivable
not to have such a taboo. This would be either utopian or dystopian,
depending on the reader.

About the Author

Sam Vaknin is the author of "Malignant Self Love - Narcissism Revisited" and the editor of mental health categories in The Open Directory, Suite101, and searcheurope.com.

His web site: http://samvak.tripod.com

Frequently asked questions regarding narcissism: http://samvak.tripod.com/faq1.html

Narcissistic Personality Disorder on Suite101: http://www.suite101.com/welcome.cfm/npd

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